Written
By: Mistress Ariachne
"It's
airline policy not to imply ownership in the event of a dildo.
Use the indefinite article. 'A' dildo. Never 'your' dildo." --Fight
Club
Interested
in hot strap-on action? Want to jack your self-love experiences
up to another level? Or perhaps you just want to experiment with
further ways to pleasure your lover. In many cases, using a dildo
can add excitement and stimulation to your play. Dildos are fairly
easy to find and purchase, pretty self-explanatory and a good
place to start if you or your partner is unfamiliar with sex toys.
To help you get started; here's my field guide to dildos and their
uses.
DILDO
MATERIALS
Dildos come in a few different materials. The best-quality (and
most expensive) dildos are made from silicone, a rubber-like substance
with significantly better durability. Silicone dildos warm up
quickly to body temperature, and their feel is most like the real
thing. They are also usually made with the most care and attention
to quality. They're not cheap, however--they can run anywhere
from $40 - $100. Think of a silicone dildo as a long-term investment.
Other
common materials are rubber, latex, hard plastic, and a newer
technology dubbed "Cyberskin." Rubber and latex tend to have a
fairly authentic feel, although they can sometimes be squishy
and hard to control. They are inexpensive, but tend to fall apart
relatively quickly. You'll also see a few dildos made out of hard
plastic--while this isn't a very lifelike feel, some people prefer
its hardness and it's easier to control. If you're using one of
these dildos, take extra care not to thrust too hard or at a pain-producing
angle.
The
latest addition to dildo technology is a squishy rubbery covering
that manufacturers refer to as "Cyberskin" (ooh, exciting and
hip!). This is definitely the material that folks either love
or hate. It's 'very' squishy and feels somewhat slimy. It can
certainly add a somewhat realistic touch to dildos--and artificial
vaginas as well, but I would recommend you actually touch a sample
first to see if you like it before ordering any Cyberskin products.
It also tends to be somewhat expensive, and I have my doubts about
its durability.
SHAPES
Dildos and dildo-shaped vibrators come in all kinds of shapes
and sizes, from realistic veined and flesh-colored penises to
an odd assortment including ears of corn, dolphins, diving women,
and even biblical figures (no, I'm not kidding--check out divine-interventions.com).
Dildos can be used for any sort of penetrative play--man on man,
woman-on-woman, heterosexual, anal, vaginal, or oral. Many vibrators
are somewhat penis-shaped and can also be used as dildos. If you're
going to use your dildo primarily for vaginal penetration, any
of the vaguely penis-shaped dildos should work. Keep in mind the
size you're going for--it's best to start with a smaller dildo
and see if you want a larger one than vice-versa. It's also up
to personal preference whether you want your dildo to have balls
or clitoris-stimulating attachments.
ANAL
DILDOS
If you're going to use your dildo for anal play, you have a few
more shape choices. Anal play differs from vaginal in a few days--first,
the membranes are easier to tear and less used to penetration,
so anal dildos tend to be smaller; second, the anal sphincter
tightens around any inserted object. If the object has a narrow
spot that the sphincter can tighten down around, it can make for
more comfortable insertion, since the sphincter doesn't have to
remain stretched around the whole girth of the dildo. This is
the idea behind the butt plug--a dildo that flares out near the
bottom, then tapers to a slender spot, then flares out again at
the very end. This design allows you to insert the butt plug and
leave it inside the anus, without worrying about it coming out
or slipping too far in. You can also get a variety of other anal-play-oriented
dildos, with rows of swellings, one swelling at the tip, and so
on.
STRAP-ONS
Regardless of whether you plan on vaginal or anal play (or both),
if you want to use a dildo harness, you'll need a dildo with a
flared base. Dildo harnesses typically keep the dildo in place
using a ring-shaped opening, sometimes lined with a rubber ring.
If there is no flared base to keep the bottom of the dildo behind
the opening, it will simply fall out.
Strap-on
play can very hot--I personally love to perform anal sex with
my male bottoms using a strap-on cock. It's a great role-reversal
prop. Most people prefer crotch-mounted dildo harnesses fbecause
they offer realistic placement. These are usually made in leather
or nylon webbing, with a crotch-piece and one or two straps per
leg. The more straps, the more stable the strap-on will be. Most
high-quality harnesses are adjustable. A few harnesses have double
openings or inside pockets, allowing the wearer to use another
dildo or vibrator on the inside. You can also find thigh-mounted
harnesses--for lesbian play, I prefer these because they give
you more control and leave your own privates open for stimulation.
One of my best fantasies involves a thigh-strap-on circle of women!
You
can also get head-mounted harnesses (really) or modify a thigh
harness to strap a dildo on your knee, arm, back, or anywhere
else you might want to (one of my yet-to-be-carried-out fetish
outfit ideas is to strap dildos on every conceivable body surface,
like a big, silicone-covered porcupine).
DILDO
USE AND CARE
As with any sex toy, to keep your play safe, you should use a
new condom on your dildos every time. This also helps keep them
clean in general. You'll find that rubber, silicone, and especially
Cyberskin tend to pick up any dust or hair in their vicinity.
If you're using your dildo only on yourself or a fluid-bonded
partner, you can use it without a condom, but it does make it
easier to keep it clean if you use one.
To
wash dildos, run them under warm water with just a bit of antibacterial
soap. Rinse and dry well. I recommend storing them in individual
plastic bags to prevent dust and lint collection. To sterilize
silicone dildos, you can also place them in boiling water for
three minutes.
How
you best like to use your dildo is up to you. I would, however,
recommend using a water-based lube for best results (especially
for anal play!). Above all, experiment with any new dildo to find
out how you best like it used on you--or how your partner likes
it used on them. Different dildos can offer quite different sensations,
and may lend themselves to slower, faster, gentler, or harder
play or different angles. For starters, place a condom on the
dildo, lube it up, and push the tip slowly inside you or your
partner. If either of you is new to dildo play, it's best to combine
it with a lot of other stimulation (clitoral, penile, kissing
the back of the neck, etc.). Once you or your partner has relaxed,
you can push the dildo in further, being mindful not to jam it
in hard (unless that's the style of play you prefer). You can
have extremely satisfying dildo play without moving the dildo
in and out, but at some point, you may want to try thrusting,
slowly and first and then faster. Be sure to continue giving yourself
or your partner other stimulation if it is requested.
In
role-playing scenes, I often tell my "woman" male sub how good
my cock feels inside him, how hard he is making me, etc. Whatever
your technique, the best advice is to try different things until
you find something you really like. Happy dildoing!
Reprinted
courtesy of Bondage.com
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