Couple's Guide to Erotic Videos

Written By: C. Michael Smith

Perhaps you're a couple looking for erotic videos to watch together. Maybe you're a guy looking to introduce erotic videos to your lady. Or, possibly, you're a lady who's curious about erotic videos. In any case, it's likely that you're a bit hesitant or even a little (or a lot) pessimistic about your options. Well, you're not alone.

Adult videos are very popular. According to a 1999 survey by the Free Speech Coalition, adult retailers claimed a total of 686 million rentals of adult videos in 1998. And according to Adult Video News, an industry trade magazine, the purchase and rental of adult videos was a $4 Billion business last year.

So, who's renting and buying all of these videos? Well, I have news for you. It's not just the dirty old man in a raincoat. People from all persuasions, occupations, and walks of life are enjoying erotic videos. The largest audience is still men, as most erotic videos are still being made with men in mind, but the ladies are growing in viewership, also, as more and more erotic titles are being made with the ladies in mind. In fact, according to a poll conducted by the Ladies Home Journal in 1997, 47% of respondents enjoy using erotica or pornography for sexual arousal, enjoyment, and sexual pleasure. I believe we can greatly increase the chances for female enjoyment (and therefore couple's enjoyment) of erotic videos if we keep a few things in mind. Let's discover some of these things together, now.

Let's talk about how erotic videos can improve your relationship as a couple, let's discuss some things to look out for while watching erotic videos, let's explore some ways to help you pick out the right erotic video for the two of you, let's develop a great game plan for introducing erotic videos to your reluctant partner, and finally, let's learn some new games you can play with your partner while watching erotic videos. Let's get started, shall we?

How can your Relationship Benefit from Erotic Videos?
Enjoying erotic videos together can provide several benefits to your relationship as a couple. Consider the following:

Most Erotic Videos are Unrealistic
Mainstream erotic videos are oftentimes VERY unrealistic. Consider the following things that make porn unrealistic:

Bad Things Porn Can Teach Us (If We Aren't Careful)
While there are some things you can learn while watching erotic videos, there are some other things that you want to be sure NOT to learn. Most porn contains unrealistic expectations of sex. Be sure not to develop any of these unrealistic sexual expectations or bad habit.

Choosing the Right Erotic Video
We've just discussed many reasons that porn is oftentimes unrealistic or just downright hilarious. I believe guys are less concerned about this, as our usual main objective to watching porn is to masturbate to orgasm, and we just don't really need a great plot, believable characters, or good acting to accomplish this. We are visually stimulated and the majority of us want to get right to the action. Well, that's fine if you are alone, but many ladies are more likely to die laughing than enjoy that kind of movie or find it erotic. But it doesn't have to be that way. Picking out the right video can make a world of difference. There ARE good videos out there. Let's talk about how to find one that you can BOTH enjoy together.

"We do watch erotic movies on occasion. Our problem is finding a "good" one that's interesting to watch for more than 5 minutes. My husband and I both seem to prefer erotic videos that at least make some sort of attempt at a plot, as opposed to what I would consider true pornographic movies." Amy, 28

Women will typically respond better to videos with more romance, a lot of touching, interesting storylines, better plot development, better actors, more interesting characters, great costuming, elaborate sets, attention to cinematography, good lighting, and directors that take their job seriously. Look for women-friendly videos from producers such as Candida Royale, Andrew Blake, and Wicked Pictures.

There are also a lot of specialty tapes that you may wish to take a look at together for the purposes of exploring your fantasies. While these tapes may not be women-friendly, they still may be fun to watch together if you have always wondered about a certain type of sex and wish to explore it together. There are literally thousands of titles to fulfill nearly every (legal) fantasy or desire you could possibly imagine - and then some. Pick you pleasure.

Did you know that there are tapes dealing specifically with: amateur, anal, anime, Asian, bi, big cocks, bukake, big breasts, big & heavy, bondage, cartoons, cheerleaders, comedy, deepthroat, double penetration, ebony, educational, facials, female ejaculation, gangbangs, gay, grandmas, hairy, interracial, Latina, lesbian, lingerie, masturbation, oral, orgy, over 40, over 50, swingers, threesomes, toes, toys, transgender, voyeurism, watersports, and young ladies, just to name a few?

Where/How to Purchase Erotic Videos
You can purchase erotic videos from your local adult book store, but many people don't want to or don't like to go into these places. If you've never been in an adult bookstore, or if it's been awhile, you may be in for a surprise. Many adult bookstores have changed over the last few years. No longer are they all dark, seedy places that make you uncomfortable. A few are still like that, but most have made changes to appeal more to women and couples. You'll find many of them well lit and well stocked with friendly, knowledgeable staff, ready to answer your questions and lead you in the right direction. But just in case you still aren't comfortable with this option, I wanted to offer you a few others.

First Video Recommendations
Here's a little help in selecting your first title.

Introducing Erotic Videos to your Partner
It can be fun and exciting to introduce your partner to erotic videos. How you go about introducing them can make or break the deal, many times. Here are some tips to help you along:

• Address concerns. If your partner has concerns about watching erotic videos, then you'll have to address these first before you're going to get too far in getting them to watch with you.
• Pick out the video together. Choose a video that is couple-friendly, to make the best first impression. Be sure to ask your partner what they'd like to see.
• Arouse your partner before you turn the video on. You'll have a much more receptive partner this way, rather than relying on the video alone to arouse them.
• Be prepared with all the supplies you need. Once you have your partner aroused, you don't want to have to leave the room for lube, condoms, or towels.
• Hold each other close and engage in a lot of touching while watching the video.
• Let your partner know that it's ok to tell you when they see something in particular that turns them on. In fact, you'd really like that.
• Keep the remote handy. If you come across anything that detracts from your or your partner's arousal, such as an anal sex scene that turns you off, or an actor that you find physically unattractive, then fast forward to the next scene.

Games to Play:
Watching erotic videos can add some fun to your sex life, too. Here are a few games to play with your partner while watching videos.

Erotic Isolation Game:
This game is best played after you have watched a few videos together in the past. The reason I don't think it's a great idea for first time viewers is due to the fact that you must sit apart from each other for this game. Here's how to play: For this game, put on an erotic video, but sit apart from each other, naked. Absolutely no touching each other for a preset period of time - say 30 minutes. You MAY touch yourself, but must not reach orgasm. All you can do is watch the video and let the erotic tension inside you build until time is up. When time is up, you can do anything you wish. Just be careful not to wake the neighbors, as you're likely to make love like ravenous beasts.

Erotic Imitation Game:
Watch an erotic movie and recreate the scenes with your partner.

Conclusion
Erotic videos can be fun, sexy, exciting, beneficial, and entertaining for couples to watch together. You can minimize the bad elements in erotic videos provided you take the time to search out titles that are couple-friendly. In time, you'll discover a certain genre, certain actors, or certain production companies that deliver exactly what works best for the two of you. In the meantime, experiment with different titles and genres and don't forget to have fun!

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