Introduction
Written By: Anne Semans
[Anne
Semans is the senior editor at Libida.com. She's the co-author
of The Mother's Guide to Sex, The New Good Vibrations Guide to
Sex, and The Woman's Guide to Sex on the Web.]
I'm
a big proponent of masturbation. When introducing the subject
to people,I like to ask them, "when was the last time you
gave yourself a hand?" I was heartened to see in the Clitical
survey that the answer many contributors gave to this question,
was "oh, about an hour ago!" The women who describe
their varied self love adventures in this survey know that masturbation
deserves a place in one's daily routine, right up there with a
morning cup of coffee or an afternoon workout.
Why
masturbate?
Studies have proven that regular sexual activity improves your
health and lengthens your life span. But that doesn't mean singles
will kick the bucket sooner than the partnered; masturbation is
an equal opportunity sexual practice, one you can enjoy at your
discretion and convenience. Masturbation offers some very specific
health benefits, which include relieving menstrual cramps, strengthening
the pelvic muscles, fighting yeast infections (by increasing blood
flow to the pelvis), reducing the risk of prostateinfections,
and alleviating stress.
Tiptoeing
through the tulips regularly will also relax and rejuvenate you.
When the kids, the partner, the house or the job all seem like
too much, try turning to yourself for a little comfort and tension
release. Tired out from a day of running after your kids? Sleep
will come easily after a quick solo turn with your favorite vibrator
(which are great if your hand tires easily). Not in the mood for
a full-on sexual encounter, but still want a little sexual intimacy?
You and your partner can masturbate together-that way you get
just what you want, plus you get to experiment with a little exhibitionism
and voyeurism.
I
also like to say that masturbators make better lovers. Masturbation
provides an excellent opportunity to get to know yourself better
sexually. By experimenting with different rhythms, toys or breathing
exercises, you're able to get more in tune with your sexual response.
Once you discover what works for you, you can articulate or show
your partner what turns you on and your confidence as a lover
will increase. And if you're experiencing a bout of diminished
desire, masturbation provides a low key way to be sexual, with
several side benefits. Very often, spending leisurely time loving
yourself will get you in the mood for more sexual adventure. At
the very least it helps improve your sexual self-esteem.
And
last but not least, as the women responding to the Clitical survey
make abundantly clear, masturbation is simply fun. It feels terrific.
Who can resist a regular jolt of orgasmic bliss? As one respondent
says, "I came with a thousand juices gushing out of me that
night, and a smile ofdelight."
Let
Me Count the Ways
If you've ever imagined that all women masturbate the same way,
you're in for a big surprise in the following pages. I think it's
safe to say that no two women masturbate alike. Sure plenty of
us like two fingers on the clit, but when you take into account
direction, speed, pressure, then throw in positions, toys, fantasy
material and location, you're in for some amazing diversity. I
remember sitting among a group of women once who all revealed
their favorite way to masturbate was using the Hitachi Magic Wand
vibrator, but none of us used it in the same way. Some laid on
top of it, some slid it between partners, others placed a towel
between clit and vibrator. I was stunned, because I hadn't realized
there were so many different ways to employ one toy, or that my
way wasn't the only way. It actually ended up freeing me from
my one tried and true method and gave me some fresh approaches.
We've
Come a Long Way Baby
What I love about these survey results is that they show us a
generation of women who are eminently comfortable masturbating.
There is no shame, guilt or secrecy here. No way, quite the opposite.
Women are looking for new ways to celebrate and explore their
sexuality. As the online contingent quickly discovered, masturbation
is vital to cybersex--and many women are logging on and entering
into hot virtual relationships in ways previously not possible.
The use of explicit material, another age-old no-no for women,
today plays a big part in our solo adventures. And the imaginative
use of toys, whether they're bonafide sex toys like vibrators
or dildos, or make-do numbers like electric toothbrushes and candlesticks,
attest to the enterprising spirit women apply to their sexual
pursuits.
Read
the survey results and walk away a changed woman. You'll get lots
of new ideas for ways to masturbate. You'll get validation and
enthusiasm from other fans of masturbation. And I expect you'll
feel the sexual undercurrent of many of these self-love sessions,
which will inspire you to drop everything and give yourself a
hand.
Enjoy,
Anne Semans
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